Thursday, January 21, 2010

Feathered friends ... not to me

It is not a secret that I am not a fan of birds. It is not that I am afraid of them or that I hate them. Give me a dog any day. I am even willing to sneeze around cats. But birds ... I just don't want them near me.

It all started when I was 8 years old. My dad and I found a baby bird who had fallen out of a tree. We brought it in and created a little nest in my old hamster cage. We even fed her with an eye dropper. That baby bird thanked us with a flea infestation.

The next instance happened when I was 13 years old sitting at lunchtime under a tree with a group of friends. I was eating my cafeteria burrito that just an hour before had been in the freezer. The boy I had a crush on kept looking over at me. I would smile and look away. I knew I was looking totally cute dressed in my awesome black Guess shirt, side zipped Guess jeans, two layers of chunky colored socks and Velcro high top Reeboks. My friends were going on about which boy they hoped would ask them to the school dance and what they were planning on wearing. All of a sudden I felt something hit my shoulder. I heard a few of the girls say "ewwwww gross." A huge splatter of white bird poop had landed on me. Laughter broke out as I blushed bright red. I went stag to the school dance the next weekend and I never sat under that tree again.

The summer before I left for college one of our neighbor's love birds had gotten out of their cage. For a week every time we stepped out of the house those bird would dive bomb our heads. There was nothing loving about those birds and by this time my love for birds stopped.

For my 24th birthday my roommate and I went to the San Francisco Zoo to celebrate. She suggested we go into the lorikeet exhibit to help me get over my issue with birds. When you enter the enclosure you get a small cup of honey water to hold in your hand. The little parrots land on your hand to drink from the cup. So sweet, right? There is a professional photographer to capture the sweet moment so that you can proudly display it on your wall. Here is how my super sweet moment was captured:

damn birds

And, that confirmed my dislike for birds.