Monday, July 12, 2010

Going the distance

I met The Boyfriend at a work conference January 12, 2009. Not one day has gone by since that night that we haven't talked. I never imagined two people could have a a relationship with over 6,000 miles of distance between them. But here we are, 18 months later and still going strong.

I get a lot of questions about our relationship. How did you meet? How often do you see each other? Will one of you relocate? But, the biggest question is how do you make it work.

Like any relationship it takes respect, compromise, open communication, trust and love. But you add 6,000 miles to the mix and you have to take all of those elements to a much higher level. I believe there is a science behind a long distance relationship ...

1) You have to like talking on the phone, or at least learn to like it. I have never been a very big phone talker. But, at the time I met The Boyfriend I need to talk and he was willing to listen. He listened to the tears, the anger, the unknown before the conversations became what they are now. Of course hearing that British accent on the other end of the line is pretty hot too!

2) TXT and IM when you are unable to talk. Since TXT is pretty expensive internationally I recommend getting a phone that has some form of instant messenger (*cough* Blackberry). You should take lots of photos and send them to each other to show what you are doing or where you are.

3) Get used to being on camera. Skype is the next best thing to sliced bread. It makes everyday life less mysterious. You can have meals together. Watch a movie together. Just be "around" each other.

4) Send letters and care packages. Mailing anything is expensive, but email is just so easy. Everyone loves getting mail because there is extra effort put into it. Plus, who doesn't love getting hand written love letters from your man?

5) Don't be scared to share. Create a shared Google calendar. Set up a shared FTP for photos, files, whatever. This cuts down on time and money.

6) Of course the most important element is when you are together make every second count. Time together becomes precious when you only get to be together 20 days a year.

Long distances relationships can work. I have 18 months to prove it!

Happy anniversary, honey! MWAH!